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View Full Version : WAR AND SACRIFICE IN UNOVA



EllaJaneBinks
11-27-2012, 06:53 AM
Alright everybody.

I have just finished the first chapter of my own FanFic story. A lot of other people's story's have inspired me to try my own.
Thanks everyone for providing feedback, it means alot to me!

I will try to add a chapter every few days, at the most a week will be the longest wait. Thanks all for reading!

I have written it in GoogleDoc's.
The chapter's are also very long, so please only comment if you've actually read it all.

I hope you enjoy what I have written. Cristisism is also welcome.

Chapter 1 - War and Sacrifice in Unova https://docs.google.com/document/d/16qel9zJ_Wv6EflSsYyH37ldiXnQfApatv5rvTzmsz-I/edit
Chapter 2 - War and Sacrifice in Unova https://docs.google.com/document/d/1gmiu9bnM3t1ujYoWTjYcWiGlypY6YrRTCooabxysty4/edit
Chapter 3 - War and Sacrifice in Unova https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_1nNhXz1dcg9osk61OWF0rvxwJWqkRyI3HBixYZCrRg/edit
Chapter 4 - War And Sacrifice in Unova https://docs.google.com/document/d/1MgB29wm8Osaje-ERlRwyqhkqqzSU724dkTrCsBqjxdo/edit
Chapter 5 - War And Sacrifice in Unova https://docs.google.com/document/d/1PUSzljOcCVfq4rqHtIneQzlez8Dh0lgR6onUzAqQnMw/edit
Chapter 6 - War And Sacrifice in Unova https://docs.google.com/document/d/1X7-xLmfWrvkM3mZy2lTANf4rb7GnTfyGKUO1WwGwJD8/edit
Chapter 7 - War And Sacrifice in Unova https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ieu0fItdkNuK3mgSf021nR3rjMLeYXcosLP7DYd7ybA/edit?usp=sharing

The Kiwi Dragon
11-27-2012, 06:56 AM
OMFG... I love it! :D It's great!

EllaJaneBinks
11-27-2012, 07:03 AM
Wow how quickly do you read haha! I just finished it like five seconds ago :P Thanks Venom!

Cheez13
11-27-2012, 07:24 AM
love it

GaryEhffinJoaker
11-27-2012, 07:30 AM
well... that was definitely different than the stories on this site for sure. Not just different but very well written. I can honestly say I didn't like it but indeed did LOVE it! I don't think I've found myself so drawn to a story from the very start. Very engaging. I personally look forward to more! :)

EllaJaneBinks
11-27-2012, 07:34 AM
Aw shucks Gary :3 I may just have to continue writing :)

GaryEhffinJoaker
11-27-2012, 07:41 AM
I sincerely hope you do, Ella! I'll definitely subscribe and look forward to more. :)

Fennelito'sHelp
11-27-2012, 07:47 AM
Oh my GOSH this is freaking AWESOME!!!! I have a third fanfic to subscribe to and follow now!!! This is just... WONDERFUL!!!! <333333333 :3 :o

EllaJaneBinks
11-27-2012, 08:10 AM
Aw thanks so much Juni :3 I'm so surprised people like it! Thanks everyone!

The Kiwi Dragon
11-27-2012, 09:10 AM
I forgot to say I'd subscribe! Seeing as you subscribed to mine!

EllaJaneBinks
11-27-2012, 10:02 AM
Yes :3 I'm waiting for more of yours Venom!

Baby Koga
11-27-2012, 05:34 PM
Hahaha "Pickles!". I actually laughed so hard at that. This is an awesome story and extremely well written. Can't wait for the next part!!! :o

DarkCloud7
11-27-2012, 11:12 PM
ERMAHGERD THIS IS SO AMAZING!!! What a very well written story! It was fantastic!! Can't wait for more!!!!!

Ninfias
11-27-2012, 11:28 PM
ANOTHER AWESOME FANFIC!!! OMFG!! TIME TO FANGIRL OVER THIS ONE TOO! You're an amazing writer, keep them coming!!<33

GaryEhffinJoaker
11-28-2012, 01:18 AM
wow... I really love this story. Very engaged at this point more than ever.

EllaJaneBinks
11-28-2012, 01:19 AM
Gary I need some constructive criticism! :P

GaryEhffinJoaker
11-28-2012, 01:22 AM
O.O from me.....? Um... other than a few typos such as using 'you're' where you should use 'your' and a few other mispelled things that occur rarely, I cant see that ANYTHING is wrong with your story, Ella. It's... quite frankly amazing. The most original thing I've read here. I see absolutely no flaws honestly...

DarkCloud7
11-28-2012, 01:25 AM
ER.MAH.GERD. The second part is even better!!! SO AMAZING!!! <33

EllaJaneBinks
11-28-2012, 01:29 AM
Thanks Gary! I'm going to try and work on that! I usually just let it auto-correct >.>

GaryEhffinJoaker
11-28-2012, 01:32 AM
No biggie. I always have a couple errors in my stories too, even after proofreading, lol. Anyway, a seriously great story you have here. Nothing else like it on the site at all.

The Kiwi Dragon
11-28-2012, 06:44 AM
Awesomeness!
EDIT: My 800th Forum Post... Woot!

EllaJaneBinks
11-28-2012, 10:22 PM
*Gives medal to Venom* :p

The Kiwi Dragon
11-29-2012, 02:34 AM
Thanks Ella! :D

GaryEhffinJoaker
11-29-2012, 10:21 AM
So far I personally feel your stories are being delivered beautifully and full of detail and consistently are an engaging read, promising more of the same from the next story. Don't have the slightest critique for this story in any way. :)

EllaJaneBinks
11-29-2012, 11:34 AM
Aw thanks Gary! Not just for being nice, but for also being a great outlet and for being able to talk to you about both our stories! I feel like it's a really nice to be able to talk to you about it all :3

Everyone, a new chapter is out! Enjoy! (I hope everyone get's this notification, Gary :P )

Baby Koga
11-29-2012, 01:30 PM
Finally got around to reading Chapters 2 and 3... WOW! That was some of the best description I have ever read on Pokebay. I love the way you detail yor emotions and I'm extremely interested to see how you approach chapter 4. This is only the second time I have ever done this, but... *SUBSCRIBES* XD

EllaJaneBinks
11-29-2012, 01:57 PM
Aw thanks Mr.Butters :3 It really means a lot to me, the next Chapter will be out soon so keep and eye out :)

GaryEhffinJoaker
11-29-2012, 08:01 PM
Aw thanks Gary! Not just for being nice, but for also being a great outlet and for being able to talk to you about both our stories! I feel like it's a really nice to be able to talk to you about it all :3

Everyone, a new chapter is out! Enjoy! (I hope everyone get's this notification, Gary :P )

Yeah don't mention it. It's nice talking with you as well. I'm sure they'll get notification, lol. Or at least notice the new post from you (or me since I'm sending this message) in the creative repository. I have a strong feeling your story isn't going unnoticed, lol. Keep it up.

EllaJaneBinks
12-02-2012, 08:36 AM
Hey there everyone, another Chapter has been added to the story!

Hope you all enjoy it!

Baby Koga
12-02-2012, 10:26 PM
Congrats in receiving over a thousand views and in such a small amount of time too! It took me aaaaaggggessss to get that! It's well deserved! Can't wait to read more!!! :D

GaryEhffinJoaker
12-02-2012, 11:00 PM
O.O Sugar Honey and Iced Tea 1,000. You'll be top views before the month is out, easy. Super congrats! The mystery of where your story is headed is truly a strong point. Keep it up.

EllaJaneBinks
12-03-2012, 03:34 AM
Haha sugar honey and iced tea! So random Gary :P!

GaryEhffinJoaker
12-03-2012, 04:38 AM
It's an acronym from the movie Madagascar actually ;)

carcinoGeneticist
12-03-2012, 05:34 PM
I actually just found time to read this thing, and you are very descriptive writer.

I was hooked from the beginning. Nice job!

EllaJaneBinks
12-04-2012, 12:23 PM
Aw thanks so much NobodyBlues :3 Expect a link from me soon!

Aparently designing costumes for characters is not as easy as it seems! Lol.

EllaJaneBinks
12-08-2012, 07:45 AM
Just letting everyone know that I've been extremely busy lately, but a new chapter will be posted Sunday afternoon/night so stay tuned everybody! :)

EllaJaneBinks
12-09-2012, 04:06 PM
Hey there all, Chapter 5 has now been added :) Enjoy!

beast212
12-09-2012, 08:06 PM
this is really good

Fennelito'sHelp
12-11-2012, 05:23 AM
btw my dear Umbr-ella ella ella ay ay :o Ur stories are freaking arguable the BEST on the entire site. Seriously. You've made a fanfic of original origins and are doing like AMAZING!!! Never end it EVER!! I LOVE IT!!! <333333

EllaJaneBinks
12-12-2012, 05:48 AM
Thanks so much Juni :) It makes me happy to hear you're all enjoying it!

carcinoGeneticist
12-12-2012, 05:54 PM
Write moar. I crave this. ;-;

EllaJaneBinks
12-13-2012, 01:06 AM
I'm writing more as we speak :3

EllaJaneBinks
12-13-2012, 10:49 AM
Okay guys, chapter 6 of my story is up :)

Hope you all enjoy!

EllaJaneBinks
12-18-2012, 01:31 PM
Next Chapter due for tomorrow :)

The Kiwi Dragon
12-21-2012, 01:00 AM
This series is going good!
I can't wait for Chapter 7!

Edit: 1000th Post

EllaJaneBinks
12-21-2012, 08:45 AM
Thanks Venom!

Unfortunately, I'm going to be away from writing for a moment, I just have so much going on and not much time to write the next chapters, as soon as I get time I will get stuck right back into it, but I just have travelling and family and like 3 Christmas's to worry about at the moment, anyway I hope you all look forward to the next time I add a chapter and so sorry for this inconvenience everyone!

GaryEhffinJoaker
12-21-2012, 08:47 AM
Awww take your time and enjoy your holiday!

EllaJaneBinks
12-21-2012, 09:00 AM
Thanks Gary! You all have a very merry Christmas :D!!!!

chuwachuwa
12-22-2012, 08:49 PM
Loved it I cant write like that like,
I turned to my mother and screamed or like that I can only write like
Jack walked to the cookie jar

EllaJaneBinks
02-01-2013, 10:57 AM
Hey guys :3 Just letting you know I'm back and I'll be starting up my writing again continuing on from where I left off. The website's changed a lot in the time I've been gone and looks great!

Look forward to chatting with you all soon.

Fennelito'sHelp
02-01-2013, 05:10 PM
*fangirl screams* :3

Baby Koga
02-01-2013, 06:54 PM
... AWESOME!!!

GaryEhffinJoaker
02-01-2013, 07:13 PM
Eeeeeeexcellent...

EllaJaneBinks
03-05-2013, 12:01 PM
Hey guys, another chapter is now up :)

Just a few things to say -

One, is that I'm sorry it's been such a while since I've posted another chapter, Ive been extremely busy and haven't had much time to really focus on it.

Secondly, I apologise if from time to time the story will seem like it has changed or if it seems as though I've lost my touch. This story is as new to me as it is to you, I write it by ear and I plan for it to be long so if it seems like things aren't going anywhere or as though the plot has gone haywire then I apologise profusely :P

It's just my writing style and it's not something I want to change. I enjoy the way I write so I hope you guys enjoy it all the same.

Also I've tried to change the format that I write it, so that my chapters don't seem so long.

Anyway, enjoy everyone.

GaryEhffinJoaker
03-05-2013, 03:36 PM
Do it your way. In the end, you'll have something you're more proud of and the overall quality I'm sure will make the story as a whole, incredible. I'll have to read this on my break. :)

EllaJaneBinks
03-06-2013, 12:00 AM
Thanks Gary, you know I always appreciate your advice!

GaryEhffinJoaker
03-06-2013, 12:12 AM
Well I see you haven't lost your touch at all. The latest story is just as descriptive, detailed, and clearly cared for by you as all your other chapters have been. Read it while walking home, crossing streets and everything, lol. Just may want to watch your 'it's/its.' Other than that, absolutely flawless and very exciting. I don't really follow up on the styler and ranger games, so I don't know if your description f how the styler works is canon from the ranger games or if you made it up on your own (Mage bonus points if you thought that up by yourself), but either way, it was really descriptive and well written. This was like, REALLY, great.

EllaJaneBinks
03-06-2013, 02:11 AM
Thanks Gary! I'm a bit worried that you're reading while walking and crossing roads! I wouldn't want you to get into an accident now! That sounds quiet dangerous for me :P Lol but thanks, and most of it I did make up, in the games you are basically told that the styler is an apparatus that helps convey the rangers feelings to help capture a Pokemon. Other than that, everything else came from me, just trying to expand on that a bit more :)

GaryEhffinJoaker
03-06-2013, 02:25 AM
Well, in that case... I must say that that was an absolutely, just... INCREDIBLE take on how the Stylus works. The description was deep, and just fantastic. Absolutely incredible what you did with the latest chapter. I guess I'd have to say you're without a doubt the best writer on the site. I'd recommend you expanding it to a fanfiction site like fanfiction.net if you wanted, as I've done with my own fanfic. You are an actual, incredible, amazing talent. What I got from your latest chapter was absolutely true dedication and attentiveness to a story. Absolutely mind blowing, I must say, honestly. The next chapter is highly awaited by me. Worth getting hit by a car for :p (Don't worry, I kept my eyes on the street)

EllaJaneBinks
03-06-2013, 04:29 AM
Aw thanks Gary it means a lot when people like it! And actually someone did send me a pm and told me I should post onto FanFiction.com or something or rather? I'm not sure though, it's just that I've just gotten used to this site and I feel really comfortable here, so when I go onto a new website everything's so confusing!

I might eventually do that and hit the big leagues with you Gary haha but for now I just wanna see how it goes and if this story is promising enough to post somewhere else!

GaryEhffinJoaker
03-06-2013, 04:33 AM
Aw thanks Gary it means a lot when people like it! And actually someone did send me a pm and told me I should post onto FanFiction.com or something or rather? I'm not sure though, it's just that I've just gotten used to this site and I feel really comfortable here, so when I go onto a new website everything's so confusing!

I might eventually do that and hit the big leagues with you Gary haha but for now I just wanna see how it goes and if this story is promising enough to post somewhere else!

Well, fanfaiction.net is very confusing tbh to navigate, but I'll help ya through it if you ever decide to use it. I think your talent should be shared with as many people as possible. I'm truly awed with your work. :)

EllaJaneBinks
03-06-2013, 04:40 AM
You're so sweet! Okay it's done, if I go on I'll look you up straight away and you can show me the ropes! Hehe should be really fun when the time comes!

GaryEhffinJoaker
03-06-2013, 04:44 AM
You're so sweet! Okay it's done, if I go on I'll look you up straight away and you can show me the ropes! Hehe should be really fun when the time comes!

kk. I was so lost in understanding how the site worked at first. I got the hang of it after a while. I'll bet you'll be a huge freaking hit no doubt. It's nice to gain views from people who don't know you in any way and are a fan of quality fanfictions. You're gonna be absolutely amazing there in an extremely short amount of time. I'm too sure of it. Glad you're back again.

Zrkome
05-06-2013, 10:01 AM
I haven't read this yet, but I going to read it on the weekend this saturday, yes, I am giving up my gaming time to read a fine pokemon novel written by a fine aussie :).